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October 4th, 2004

Is it October

Rambling story one -So, boyz and girlz, here I am again. Lets see, I did the initial workshop on the new EGC handbook, and the next week I went to the D&S Mass, largely because I think A.N. is the best new priestess-prospect I’ve seen in years, and she was doing the Mass. There was a guy there that used to be with Pyramid Lodge and he knew all the folks from way back—my bud Bob S, the only guy in the order with more radical ideas than mine, Norman etc. etc. but he’s lived in Atlanta for years, but never crossed paths. I arranged with the one novice priest, the Camp Master in Tampa, under my supervision, to do the workshop one on one. Hes my only novice in FL, I think its best to leave FL to JW and NW, but Rick P. trained with JC and me, and he asked for my supervision explicitly, and I cleared it with the Primate. So, thats still hanging in the wind, along with a couple of strays in GA and Danny and Shannon (not that they neeed it) in AL. Good grief, this really called to my attention how many priests, priestesses, deacons and novices I’m supervising. Twenty some odd at the moment. It also brings back how many have come and gone, how much has changed. O, the Mass was B plus or A minus, the Deacon needs work, but knows it, and D&S looks like a real lodge to me, the first since Eulis Two. (In fairness, brother Neighbor was headed that way on his watch, but got out of the lbm biz when it was still doing the suburban body thing).

I remember back in Eulis One after my first consecration externo, then recognized in writing by the Patriarch as interno (which was a surprise to me), and Bil, the Lodge Master, as soon as I got back to town had me Baptize and Confirm all the people who had been waiting for years. This was near the peak of what was threatening to be the largest body outside NY and CA, and – in the absence of a formal ritual guideline we elected to do dunk baptisms and a ceremony I composed for those who had been around for a long time and also wanted confirmation, and I started dunkin an confirmin around 5 PM and was still at it at 4 AM. I lost track of the numbers. People came from all over the region.

Then, a year later, Bil tells me that J.W. and HB were going to put me up in a hotel in NYC, cause the Caliph wanted to Consecrate me by laying on of hands within OTO. It was a cool trip with some dynamite magick I’ll go into with anyone with four hours to spare and a suspension of disbelief, involving Magical Childe, getting lost in Manhattan, the fake ring of power that worked, the consecration itself at the secret address that I ate, but thas really too much for a journal entry. Anyway, I get back all bishoped again, and Bil says, “well, we’ve got all these new people, so do it again, and this time I dunked and confirmed and did one priestess followed by a Mass for about 15 hours. Its all a blur. I think I must have bapt about a hundred people in that year (87-88), and have no idea of who 75% were….I considered that up to the LM, who, under the custom of the time, was one step under the OHO who was barely one step under God Himself. Or so it seemed to me. I was soaked. My robes, which were cardinal red (my pseudo catholic period), were pasted to my body, and when I peeled them off (in those days they was absolutely no bugga-bugga about nudity – or much of anything else at Eulis), I was mostly cardinal red in the flesh as well. My back hurt.

Story two. I dunno how wise it is to talk about UFO stuff on a lj that gets peaked at by some of the very occultists –mostly followers of Jerry – who slammed me hard for my UFO book (which everyone outside the order and some inside swear by-it has become a sought-after cult classic, but from the reaction I got from the big bosses and the Jerry people youd think I had published the initiations) but when weird stuff happens, it happens. My middle son, Karl, the high school ROTC cadet, took a picture of a Something, and I dispatched it to my Kodak Executive and photo analyst in Russia, Col. Choron (yes, he is distantly related to the late Tamyr), and he had some pretty interesting things to say: “That photo that Karl took over your house is fascinating. I ran it through my Kodak programming to see what would come up. Without an actual print and the negative, of course, the results aren't exact, that's one of the reasons that I don't care for digitals in our line of investigation... But... they're exact enough to determine that there is definitely an object there and that it is three dimensional and a part of the actual photo, not a flaw or defect in the camera. The bitmap analysis shows that it extremely far away from the lens, but seems to be extremely large. There is atmospheric distortion, which means that it is at least several thousand feet up, but there is a definite "break" or border which differentiates a solid object form any kind of shadowing or light anomaly.” Karl doesn’t know what to make of it, nor do I. It looks like a - well - flying saucer - The whole subject is one that continues to intrigue me, without having any beliefs whatsoever on the subject.

Story three – I got into it with Keith and, unintentionally,and Doug R who sounded so much like Keith I thought he was him. Jeez, I call these guys “The Dogs of Reason”. I dont interpret Liber AL. Fundamentalism and holy book thumping clashes entirely with my attitude, and Ive seen it lead to all kinds of mischief and occasional tragedy (Joel and Wyrdsli and Tom come to mind), but I can read. So the following is without interpretation, and consists of (A) a quote from the American Heritage dictionary, and (B) a quotation from Liber AL [II:27-32]. As a Scientific Illuminist, my preferred self-description, I seek to investigate occultism, for such truths as validate themselves and for such aspects as can be disproved. Faith has nothing to do with it, but formal, conventional logic can equally be a trap when dealing with spiritual truth:

Logic 1. The study of the principles of reasoning, especially of the structure of propositions as distinguished from their content and of method and validity in deductive reasoning….from logos, reason.

AL II
27. There is great danger in me; for who doth not understand these runes shall make a great miss. He shall fall down into the pit called Because, and there he shall perish with the dogs of Reason.
28. Now a curse upon Because and his kin!
29. May Because be accursed for ever!
30. If Will stops and cries Why, invoking Because,
then Will stops & does nought.
31. If Power asks why, then is Power weakness.
32. Also reason is a lie; for there is a factor infinite
& unknown; & all their words are skew-wise.

Story Four – The MBA and Beat Poetry. This is another segment on Karl, who is interested in what he is interested in, rather than in what school tells him to be interested in, and Sheila, being a good mom, wanting him to more than stagger through school, knowing what a 14 year old from a family of modest means rarely does, that if you emerge in this society without the Appropriate Credentials, you get screwed royally, and possibly all your life.

So, he’s got this total asshole with a Ph.D. teaching him English Comp., and it’s a real struggle for a kid who won’t read the text in an open-book test, but who memorizes every issue of GameInformer. So, Sheila proceeds, using the various Word grammar functions and the reading index, to help him compose a description of the little cat that sits on your PC while you type…I call him “Ashcroft” but thats another story. Anyhow, after much strain, they get it up to 9th grade level, letter perfect. “OK,” says Karl, “you do it.” Being Sheila, she proceeds to try. Now, creative writing is not her forte but she gets it there, and next day shows me both. As she reads her piece, suddenly the lights dim, I hear a drum and bass doing late 1950s free jazz in the background, her head grows a beret and I realize she has written some excellent beat poetry in the process of persuading Mr. Fleisch and Mr. Kincaid to give her a 12th grade paper. So, I break it to her she is a beat poet. I put on Miles Davis. I return to my youth, and read it the way us proto Def beats did it. It goes (be sure to hear the dry jass, and snap your fingers if you like it). Shades, berets and expresso help a lot:

Hysterical lines flow from the mouth of the kitten that sits on my desk.
Overflowing with material from numerous attempts at writing the most humorous essay possible
For a fan base of moronic adults often schooled in the fine art of idiocy by the time they are old enough
To form a coherent thought .
The more the kitten moves its mouth the more often
I feel capable of expressing my utter and complete contempt
For the furry-brained nuance of the latest Version of late night fuzz.
Please allow me the decency of pandering my trade to the coffee shop crowd in Seattle;
I beg the kitten that sits to my left, purring out words of drivel that only a
Southerner could ever find worthy of a chuckle.
This is not the dream I envisioned as a young kitten with high aspirations.
The great satirist I longed to become would never perform under daily duress
From the dregs of human waste that crawl out of the gutter and file in to my comedic theatre.
The kitten reminds me again of the audience that awaits my success, but leaves me
Longing for days of Oscar Wilde and Sarah Bernhardt,
The wit of the century past would shrivel and balk
Under the stewardship of the kitten that rebukes my highest ideals in favor of the
Sales pitch of modern sound bite routines that leave the artist
Breathless from lackluster expectations and saddened by the
Descent into dark ages of comedy central.

I’ve been writing poetry all my life. She tries to teach the kid how to write acceptable 9th grade English comp and sings the coffee house blues. Snap,snap snap, way cool, daddy.


Ok, so I close with a quote: “ “In deconstruction, the critic claims there is no meaning to be found in the actual text, but only in the various, often mutually irreconcilable, ‘virtual texts’ constructed by readers in their search for meaning.” Rebecca Goldstein

I lied. One more thing. If you are programming literate, and physics literate, or just dogged like me, do read A NEW KIND OF SCIENCE, probably the most important fundamental scientific proposal in decades, the author being famous, a successful businessman as well as a science prodigy, who knows he is, but who self-published because he could, and you need to ignore or gently smile at his near-Elizabethan English.

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